The Screwball Times Expert. Juvenile. Baseball Insights.

Todd Coffey is Large and Always Sprinted When He Came Into a Game from the Bullpen

by Fred Hofstetter on September 3, 2017

Todd Coffey likes to sprint really fast into the mound. Watch him do it.

Look at that tongue.

Look at him go.

I love it when it’s shot like a Bigfoot sighting.

Apparently he did it because he liked the adrenaline rush. I like it because it looks funny.

Quick Hits

Yankees Invade Indians' Territory and Conquer Them

by Fred Hofstetter on October 12, 2017

The Yankees stormed the shores of Progressive Field and conquered the Indians by force in Game 5 of the ALDS.

Brewers Within 1 Game of Rockies in Wild Card with 0 Games Remaining

by Fred Hofstetter on October 1, 2017

With a win on Sunday in St. Louis, the Brewers moved within one game of the Colorado Rockies for the second Wild Card spot with zero games left to play.

Pittsburgh Pirates will Kneel During the National Anthem to Protest the St. Louis Cardinals

by Fred Hofstetter on September 24, 2017

Before Sunday's game in PNC Park, the Pittsburgh Pirates will make a bold statement by kneeling during the National Anthem to protest the St. Louis Cardinals.

Madison Bumgarner Gets Both Cheeks Into a Swing

by Fred Hofstetter on September 3, 2017

Madison Bumgarner hit a very long home run, and Mike Krukow offered a curious throwaway comment to explain its distance.

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The Latest Articles

MLB Collusion Almost Certainly the Work of International Supervillain

by Fred Hofstetter on January 17, 2018

MLB owners and front office executives cannot be fully credited with the circumvention of crippling free agent contracts and costly draft pick compensation. Behind the curtain assuredly lies a superior foe worthy of our awe and mortal fear.

In Defense of Baseball's Pythagorean Theorem

by Fred Hofstetter on November 8, 2017

Don La Greca undressed Pythagorean Theorem supporters in a florid rant on ESPN radio - a theorem with modest potential for widespread application.

Proposing New Designated Player Roles - Excellent Ideas for MLB

by Fred Hofstetter on September 13, 2017

Pitchers can't run the bases. Fielders can't hit. Let's explore specializing every corner of Major League Baseball - from the shortstop to the bat boy.

Baseball Fans Everywhere Furious to Know Players are Cheating

by Fred Hofstetter on September 6, 2017

The Boston Red Sox were caught cheating. They've been using Apple watches to steal signs. MLB fans around the league are furious to know about it.

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